Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Fetal Misogynist Pigs

The Oracle sees things that are hidden, and reveals them to the ignorant masses. It is my raisin of eater (that's French). I write today to reveal a hidden store of foul misogyny. Many think that, if anywhere, our institutions of higher learning are enlightened enough to realize the equality (if not superiority) of women. Alas, it is not so. You can see it, in part, in the way that more males than females go into the sciences, mathematics, and engineering. Such disparities MUST arise out of bigotry on the part of the educational system. This issue, however, is not what I write about today.

No, today I write about something more subtle, a pernicious, misogynist assignment frequently found in college biology courses: the dissection of "fetal pigs". I am sure it is clear to you, my wise readers, why this is a problem (besides the evil, patriarchal bloodlust that drives such a dissection).

You don't see it. I understand. The Oracle is blessed with vision denied to mere mortals. Permit me to explain. Science professors who give the above named assignment are poisoning the minds of their students in a most clever way. You see, by calling the assignment the dissection of "fetal pigs", they are essentially saying that "fetal pigs" are the same as pig fetuses. This, says the Oracle, is an Outrage.

What?!? You are still puzzled? You don't see what the difference between a "fetal pig" and a pig fetus? Poor, benighted reader, allow me to enlighten you. Perhaps there is no difference between them... if you are coming from the oppressive, patriarchal, scientific view of truth. What you need to understand, dear reader, is that there is a more important truth; a political truth. And the political truth is that these two phrases, insidiously alike, are completely different.

To understand, just replace "pig" with "human". YOU SEE?!? MISOGYNY!!! "Pig fetus", therefore, must be the only allowed term in academia. Because, that way, we see that, whether a pig fetus or a human fetus, it is just a fetus. Women must be allowed their reproductive freedom, you see, the freedom these misogynist scientists are trying to destroy. By calling a pig fetus a "fetal pig", they give scientific validation to the idea that a human fetus is a "fetal human". That would mean, in essence, that when a woman excercises her right to an abortion, she's killing a human, whereas with the proper, politically true phase, she kills only a fetus.

If people thought that for women to excercise their undeniable rights to reproductive freedom, they would be killing humans instead of just fetuses, they might try to put their evil, misogynist, oppressor hands in their wombs, and thus enslave them, reducing them to mere chattel and baby factories. It's what they've always wanted. We must deny them!

So says the Oracle of Outrage. Heed ye who would know wisdom, and thusly get pissed off.